Friday, April 5, 2013

two months later

It's been almost exactly two months since Des' diagnosis with T1D and we've learned a hell of a lot. We just got his first A1C results, and we are exactly where we should be. There were congratulations all around.

I started to feel overwhelmed from the very beginning, but then things were added to my plate without any discussion about whether or not I could even handle it. I couldn't. at the end of the month, I will be working only part time, and giving myself two days a week where I can really focus on my family. I spend too much time worrying about clients, and not enough time making sure that I am doing what is best for my life.

getting this diagnosis was difficult, but the realization that this was fated, just like everything else in my life, has helped me to accept it. I have always enjoyed taking care of people. I wanted to be a dentist, doctor, or veterinarian... but instead, I ended up  working from home and taking care of my son every day.. where only I would notice the very subtle indications that something wasn't right.

I know in my heart that if he was off at daycare, or if I had decided not to start my own business to be with him all day.. that he wouldn't still be here. If I believed in one, I would thank god.. but I don't. I have faith in something though, the earth, nature, energy.. and everything worked together to ensure that I got my baby help when he needed it most.

We were/are very lucky, and I will not be taking our lives for granted any more. each day is a gift that I am so thankful for.

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